Shut up and take my money

Pumpkin Spiced Almonds
Available at: Aldi
Cost: Shut up and take my money

Notes: Let’s get this out of the way: these things are unbelievably good. See how the bag in my picture is mauled and basically empty? This is my second bag. The first one was so good that I was too focused on eating the almonds to actually take a picture… which was no problem at all because I was more than happy to buy and eat another bag.

Also, I’m honestly not sure how much they cost. The first time I bought them, I think I paid between $3-4. But when I went to replenish my supply, they were something like $5-6. Honestly, whatever. It’s a good sized back of pumpkin spiced awesome, so either price is fair to me.

Did you want more detail about the almonds? Each one is coated in a pumpkin spice dust which adheres to the almonds through some kind of magic (or maybe oil – I don’t know). The spice is heavy on the cinnamon, which keeps them from being too sweet. Also sometimes two almonds will stick together, which feels like winning.

Rating: 🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃

Power Balls

Pumpkin Oatmeal Energy Bites
Available At: I made them using this recipe from Bless This Mess
Quick and Easy: Yes indeed. Probably about ten minutes, including cleaning up.

Notes: Fellow pumpkin enthusiasts, have you checked out my Pinterest board yet? At press time, I have more than 500 things pinned, divided into 13 sections. And, to give you a peak behind the curtain, every week during Pumpkin Season, I spend some time digging around on that board, with the intention of choosing at least one thing that I’m going to make. There are things that have been on there for ages, and if we’re being honest, I’m probably never going to make them. I mean, maybe you should. But damn, 500+ pumpkin items, just on those boards? Its’ going to keep me busy.

Pumpkin Oatmeal Energy Bites rose to the top pretty quickly. They seemed like a good breakfast for when I’m groggy and can’t be bothered to put any effort into anything, or also
a quick “on the way out the door” kind of snack. Man, it sounds like I have a really action-packed lifestyle, doesn’t it? Well, I’m not going to tell you otherwise.

Since I am Very Busy and lead an Exciting Life, as you’ve inferred above, I was delighted that these were such a quick make. You mix pumpkin (duh) with oats and things like honey, pumpkin spice, peanut butter, chia seeds, and dark chocolate chips, roll them into balls, and put them in the fridge to chill. They’d also be work if you swapped the peanut butter for almond butter, or added craisins or coconut.

As for the balls themselves? They are all right. I didn’t love the texture of the cold oatmeal, which is basically what I’m knocking points off for, but I didn’t hate it, either. The pumpkin and the peanut butter complimented each other well. And the dark chocolate chips were a really good component, adding a bit of sweet and a bit of bitter.

Rating: 🎃🎃🎃🎃

This snack is Paleo, but don’t hate me for that, okay?

Pumpkin Spiced Nuts
Available at: I made them using this recipe from Tastes of Lizzy T
Quick and Easy: Minimal effort and 45 minutes in the oven

Notes: I needed a snack to bring to a party, and honestly, at this point if you invite me to something during pumpkin spice season, you should expect that I’m going to bring something pumpkin-y.

I didn’t want to make chili because it was hot out, and this group of people doesn’t get that excited about desserts, which I agree is weird. Pumpkin spiced nuts seemed like a perfect solution.

What you do is froth up two egg whites, mix in pumpkin spice (the recipe calls for just cinnamon, but I used pumpkin pie spice because I do what I want), vanilla, salt, and maple syrup. Then, fold in whatever kind of nuts you want. I used walnuts because I found a big bag of them for pretty cheap. Pecans would have also been good. Spread the nuts on a cookie sheet and bake at low heat for 45 minutes, stirring every 15.

You would not believe how awesome these made the house smell.

The nuts were delicious. I’d consider adding more maple syrup next time to make them a tad sweeter, but they were pretty darned great as they were. And people at the party seemed to really like them.

Also, they’re paleo if you care. I myself have a high-carb lifestyle, so…

Rating: 🎃🎃🎃🎃

Sears Catalog Level Food Porn

Pumpkin Spice Goat Cheese
Available at: Fresh Thyme

Notes: My friend Corie gifted me with pumpkin spice goat cheese. “I don’t know if it’s going to be good or not, or even how you’d eat it.” She had faith that I’d figure it out, and I appreciate that.

I decided to keep my pumpkin spice goat cheese serving simple and just spread it on some crackers. Turns out it’s on the sweeter side of cheese, like if you’ve ever tried honey goat cheese? It’s kind of like that. So I decided to make it more fancy and I tossed some craisins on top of it in what you can see above is an utterly failed attempt at more impressive food photography.

If other sites have food porn, mine is basically the equivalent of the bra section of the Sears catalog.

Also because I have green plates and styled this with the craisins and a red cloth, it looks Christmas-y AF.

But whatever, people. Let’s assume that we are substance over style, because that’s all I’ve got. Can we just talk about the cheese? It’s quite tasty. I’d say that the flavor is more pumpkin than pumpkin spice, and as I said, tends more towards sweet. And I liked it a lot. I’d for sure recommend rocking it on some crackers like I did, but it would also be really good in a simple green salad with some balsamic vinaigrette.

One more thing. If you’ve been living under a rock and are not yet following Corie as Twistin Bangs on Instagram, then what are you even doing with your life?

Rating: 🎃🎃🎃🎃

Spiced Pumpkin Pie Clif Bar

Available at: Hy-Vee
Cost: $1.50

Notes: This was a good little snack. It’s full of oats, dried fruits, cane syrup and lots and lots of nuts. It was hearty and toothy and I quite enjoyed it. The only reason I didn’t rank this higher was because I think it was a bit pricy for a quick snack.

Rating: 🎃🎃🎃

Cranberry and Pumpkin Seed Pita Crisps

Available at: Aldi
Cost: $2.50-ish

Notes: My thoughts on these pita crisps went something like this:

Me: Man, these are good.
Also me: I don’t think they taste pumpkin-y, though.
Me: They’re unexpectedly sweet. In a good way.
Also me: Seems like there are pumpkin seeds, but do they taste at all like pumpkin or pumpkin spice?
Me: Let’s eat more and find out.
Also me: Honestly, we can’t rate them very high because –
Me: Oops, the bag is now empty. We better go buy more so we can decide how to rate these.
 
Rating: 🎃

Nature Valley Crunchy Pumpkin Spice Granola Bars

Available at: Target
Cost: Around $3

Notes: Usually, I prefer chewy granola bars to crunchy, because I enjoy the sensation of my mouth not being shredded by oat shrapnel. But since this was pumpkin spice, I had to buy it. For science.

Turns out, these granola bars are really good. They have excellent PS flavor, dominated by cinnamon. They would be even better crumbled up and made into a parfait with the pumpkin yogurt of your choice.

Rating: 🎃🎃🎃🎃

Simply Nature Pumpkin Seed Tortilla Chips

Available at: Aldi
Cost: $1.99

Notes: I cannot tell you how many times someone has pointed out a pumpkin item to me and said, “Now it’s gone too far!” And in most cases, I can think of a perfectly reasonable use for said pumpkin item. Pumpkin spice flavored butter, for example, doesn’t sound even close to crazy to me, because herbed, or cinnamon butters are totally common and PS butter would be delicious, say, on a bagel. A hot dinner roll. A baked sweet potato.

Pumpkin tortilla chips? WORLD GONE MAD! PUMPKIN SPICE HAS GONE TOO FAR!

To which I say… nah.

These are no more crazy than sweet potato chips. And sweet potato chips are freaking delicious. These chips are pretty darned good, too. They have that squash-level of sweetness that one would find in an actual pumpkin. They’d be awesome with goat cheese or cream cheese covered in pepper jelly. I really enjoyed them with chili.

The world has not gone mad. At least not in this particular case.

Rating: 🎃🎃🎃🎃

This Pumpkin Walks Into a Bar…

Available at: Trader Joe’s
Or in my case: As part of a care package from my friend Maria

Notes: This is the third iteration of pumpkin cereal bars I’ve reviewed. The Pumpkin Spice Nutri-Grain bars were a solid “okay.” The cereal bars from Target were better, probably in no small part due to the fact that they had icing on them. I’d rank these pumpkin bars from Trader Joe’s on par with the Target ones. Really, TJ’s should feel pretty darned good about that, considering that theirs lack icing. The bar part isn’t too dry and the filling has excellent pumpkin flavor. Good for a quick snack.

Rating: 🎃🎃🎃-1/2